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Alone is Power

Updated: Apr 2, 2023

Man is by nature a social animal, said Aristotle. Yet, various cultures around the world have practices of solitude for various reasons and at different stages of life. Indian mythology too has many stories of sages and saints who have been going to forests to be alone to realize their enlightenment.

Being alone is not loneliness. But a whole lot of people dread being alone. Some invite aloneness and thrive in their own world while others find myriad ways to fill their alone time. In truth if you find yourself alone, whether a short period or long term, consider it a blessing. Once you go through the stages of loneliness you are in for a fine surprise. There is so much of you that life will show you in your hermit mode.

This article looks at

Reason for Aloneness

The primary reason a person finds themselves in solitude can be mental, emotional, spiritual or a necessity.

Changing beliefs - In our journey through evolution, one becomes more aware of one's own thoughts and beliefs. You may begin to question life and everything that happens to you and around you. This is one of the initial steps to finding one's core values. Coming out of herd mentality and finding one's own reason for doing what you do, can be unnerving to many. This unsettling period can vary in length depending upon the resistance one carries, the layers of unresolved issues and the support available.

Emotional Sensitivity - A heightened emotional sensitivity might be the reason for another’s aloneness. Society as a whole is predominantly intolerant to emotional expressions, especially soulful emotions. There seems to be a fixed level of sadness, love or fear that one is allowed to feel. When these emotions go beyond the accepted norms, it becomes difficult for the person going through it as well as others. Sadness and fear when not allowed to be felt, settle in the body making it sluggish. When the body and mind feel low, people naturally recede to their quiet space. We simply cannot find a common vibrational resonance with the outside world. Some people find comfort in this cocoon and may continue this solitude for the rest of their lives. There really is no judgment over this. Others may start an introspective quest that may lead them to the path of enlightenment. Many others may use addictions to cope with their sensitivity.

Spiritual Evolution - In reality, a natural urge to find our silent spot is part of our spiritual journey. Whether we consciously participate in our spiritual expansion or not, we are expanding spiritually. We are in truth spiritual beings on a human journey, rather than human beings attempting to live spiritual with practices. A greater awareness of an inner presence, and increasing psychic abilities often push people towards a quiet space that is comfortable for them.

Lonely in Relationships - At times people feel lonely in a crowd, within their families and intimate relationships. This is because of differing values and ideologies and non-acceptance of changing or differing ideas. Love and understanding are the balms that can soothe the relationships, yet it is often seen that the onus is often on the one who is feeling different from the rest. Deep love, kindness and compassion to oneself is needed to heal the emotional incompatibility before one can extend it to others.

Past life Imprints - It has been seen that souls who have had past lives in solitude, perhaps as a hermit, a prisoner, or traveller often show the same traits in the present life. As long as one is comfortable in one’s own choices it is fine. In case you want to break the pattern, conscious inner work is suggested to peel the layers of past imprints.

Physical Necessity - When the need to isolate becomes necessary as in the covid situation as well as prolonged hospital stays they often trigger deep unfamiliar emotions. The effects of such triggers may not be seen immediately but have the potential to surge at a later time in life, if left unresolved. Sometimes isolation and solitude become a necessity as a means to set healthy boundaries with others. One may also find themselves in solitude as they move away from home and family for a job.

Stages of loneliness

Emotional surges - Emotional sensitivity can range from feeling different and alone in a crowd to battling with suicidal thoughts. Withdrawing from social activities and keeping to a few and sometimes none is common with highly sensitive people. Feeling depressed, angry, frustrated, vulnerable, fear and sometimes overcoming suicidal thoughts can become a humungous task.

This is the most difficult stage of loneliness as unfamiliar and uncomfortable emotions show up at unexpected times and unwarranted situations. It goes without saying that seeking professional help is the best solution here. Awareness of highly sensitive people is on the rise and caring professional help is available globally.

Meditation, deep relaxing breathing as well as positive affirmations help to bring oneself out of an emotional tangle. It takes patience, consistency and persistence to stay steady in our daily practice towards a stable emotional standing.

Coping - One of the coping strategies that are unconsciously followed by people are getting into a pleasing mode to avoid loneliness and isolation. Some get into addictions and habits that help to numb uncomfortable emotions and escape reality. Many of us surround ourselves with situations and people that just keep us afloat and move at a comfortable pace that doesn't shake our fragile emotional stability.

Boredom - Once we cross the stage of emotional havoc by accepting our new beliefs and taming our emotions then boredom can set it. A sense of boredom is an indicator for revving up our creative energy. When our inner self is ready to explore new avenues of creative expression and our human personality is still stuck in the monotony of repetitive life, it appears as boredom.

Exploring new routes - You can explore your creative urges by signing up for simple artforms like basic pottery, painting and drawing, or a music and dance group. Ability to learn and be curious about new avenues is inborn in every human being. When put to use, life becomes one long adventure where one door opens the next and the next.

Taking ownership of your wellbeing

As you accept things the way they are and take a closer look at your emotions you'll be in a better position to let go of what doesn't serve anymore. The easiest way to let go of an emotion is by feeling it. let it come and let it go as you breathe deeply. Over a period of time, you'll find comfort in your cocoon.

The uncomfortable and unfamiliar emotions are precisely the ones that were not acceptable in our childhood. Our parents and caregivers did not have the emotional capacity to handle it and so we were trained to suppress them. By reparenting our lost and forgotten child selves we revive our lost innocence, creative powers and innate joy.

Finding your own happiness, emotional balance and strength opens you to greater human powers that are in fact normal. If you look closely, we are born alone, assisted primarily by the forces of life that flow through us.

We go through our growth milestones on our own, like turning to one side, lifting the head, crawling, sitting up, standing and walking. Our hermit mode is the best time to connect to this source code and hone our intuition and psychic abilities like clairvoyance, clairsentience, clairaudience and other potential abilities that we are born with but were masked.

Discovering newer parts in yourself and identifying the strengths to support the new version helps to emerge in your uniqueness and find your tribe. It strengthens your will power which is the gap between your soul power and your earthly desires.

It's a time to embrace the emotions within you and the thoughts that evoke these emotions. When you familiarize with the uncomfortable emotions you understand that it's your limiting thoughts that give rise to them. You can practice steering your thoughts towards more optimistic hopefulness.

Your breath is your ally here to help release these emotions. Taking gentle and deep breaths has the potential to refresh your emotional makeup as well as relax your body.

You must know that your thoughts and emotions have the potential to create your outer reality. At the same time do not be afraid of the reality and the potential outcome of your negativity. Embrace your courage and your enthusiasm to allow the truth beneath the surface which is always love - for yourself or others.

Making the most of solitude

Inner Strength - There is great strength in allowing the unexpected twists and turns and the emotions your life brings out of you. In letting yourself be vulnerable you are letting yourself feel the fullness of the moment. When you are not embarrassed by your emotions, it becomes easy to accept yourself. Even when you do not have the time or space to process a quick turnaround, please give yourself permission to enjoy this unconditional inner space.

Worthiness - Even when a good package arrives at a time when you are just awake and not yet ready, choose to receive it and entertain it. Even when goodness comes in when it is still dark make an attempt to let it in and let it be. You deserve every drop of goodness that trickles on to you and let it soothe you. Not what someone else imposes on you as what they think is the best thing for you, but what you think is best for you in this moment and in the long run.

Self-respect - Take care to not let your self-respect and dignity drop because of the stories others tell about your choices or changing attitude. It is coming from their limited minds and closed hearts. You do not have to close your heart or run away from reality based on other's evaluation of you. In your conscious aloneness you will realize that you have a choice at every moment to go on the path that you truly want.

Personal routine - In your personal den you are free to live the way you want, but having a routine that focuses on self-care is very supportive in gathering up your new version. Plan a schedule that takes care of your food, sleep, physical comfort, entertainment, inner work, exercises and socializing. Being organized is a great virtue that fuels your productivity and is cultivated through daily habit.

Chosen path - To follow your path you must first define your path, your interests and your goals. You may gently give up the demanding and authoritative path and choose the path that respects and requests. You may quietly stay away from the imposing path and allow the nurturing and giving path. You may gracefully release the forceful and pushy path and choose the smooth flowing one.

Unconditionality - In your reclusive state you may choose to push your limits on your thinking, happiness, creative pursuits and appearance. You can choose to softly let go of the demeaning people and expect mutually honouring spaces. You may choose a harmoniously cooperative path than the conditional one. An abundance of peace, love and respect is ready to be showered by the Universe when you have found your unique individuality.

In a nutshell

There is no greater love and power than being connected to your own inner self. Being comfortable with living alone, traveling alone and deciding alone becomes a pronounced part of your true nature. Enlightenment is not reserved for a few but is a natural and logical step in our path of evolution. It happens in solitude. The best gift of your conscious acceptance of your solitude is that there is never a moment when you are not without the company of your Source.

Meeting people who have individuated and have the power to lead their life on their terms is a natural outcome of the power of discovering your new version. You will find a great kinship among diverse personalities who are unique. The togetherness in such a commune can be described as purely joyful and creative!

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