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Managing Emotional Sensitivity

We are a delicate balance of light and darkness, joy and sadness, good and bad, right and wrong. That's the sentient nature of the world we live in. This perceivable duality is the basis of our very existence.

Despite duality being the nature of our life, we are intolerant of our emotions as a society. There is a small set of emotions that we have allowed for ourselves and for others. This is because we haven't quite understood the real meaning and purpose of emotions in our lives.

This blog looks at:

Why do we become sensitive?

We are born sensitive. Sensitivity, vulnerability and uniqueness are our soft truths.

We live in a world that is in a constant pursuit of happiness through perfect doings, perfect appearance, perfect career, perfect family, perfect home or perfect relationship. In this rat race to achieve these unwritten requirements we almost always lose our connection with our Source.

Consider a healthy template for the human body. Innately we know that our healthy body exists and many of us have at different points in life enjoyed health in its prime. When our body deviates from this template we know we are unwell and need help and support. So our diseases are an indication of our deviation from our good health. This is not a bad thing but merely a sign that we have a choice to return to better health.

Our emotions can also be understood in the same way. Innately we know that we are an extension of the divine all knowing field of possibility that is not separate from us. So there is a Source part of us which is nonphysical, thinking and feeling as well as a flesh, blood and bone part of us that is physical.

When our physical thoughts are in tune with this field of infinite possibilities, we feel happy. We feel natural and light. It can also be described as bliss, ecstasy and joy. In fact every time we feel an emotion that feels good, we can confidently say that our thoughts and beliefs are attuned to our inner light.

Our negative or restrictive thoughts have a different vibration from our inner vastness. This difference in vibration translates as negative emotion. Our awareness as well as deeper attunement to Source makes us sensitive to emotions.

Is sensitivity good?

Sensitivity enlarges everything and makes us mindful of our inner and outer world. Music ripples through your body, food tastes delicious that you feel your whole body responding to the layers of flavors. You see crystals in every grain of sand. Colors become more vibrant and sensational. Fragrances feel like bursting clouds of aromas. Your sense of awareness is heightened inside out.

Happiness feels like the greatest feeling on earth. Love feels Universal rather than personal. Hurt and pain feel like a thousand spears piercing through your heart. Anger feels like volcanoes erupting from the depths of your being. Sadness and grief feel like an immovable mountain on your chest.

Emotions affect and are affected by a key area of our life namely relationships. Almost always our emotions are attached to our interactions with and opinions about other people. It sometimes ranges from hypersensitivity or being touchy to feeling insensitive or watchful.

In our attempt to respond to people and situations, our reactions may range from delicate thoughtfulness to hypervigilant alertness. Our compassion and trust may be questioned, and so is our resilience and responsiveness. In deep depression, our body and mind may fail to respond to even an emergency.

At the same time, it may be noted that the emotions that we feel are the result of consistent thoughts that are either in tune with the Source within us or not. When we feel good, our thoughts match that of our Source and when we do not feel good, it is countering Source consciousness.

When emotions are not allowed to be expressed, we suppress them, forget about them and deny them. Our unexpressed emotions remain dormant like a landmine, only to be triggered by external factors like peoples’ conversations and behaviors. Sometimes deep emotions have no place to be vented out that they begin to show up in our quiet and alone moments.

Empathy is a sign of increased sensitivity. The ability to understand another’s feeling is a blessing as well as a cause for great distress. Without our knowing we embark on a negative spiral until we find it difficult to hold our negative space. Eventually we end up blaming others for our situations.

How to manage sensitivity?

Being sensitive to emotions calls for focus. Now that we understand that our emotions are indicators of our harmony with our divinity, it is our job to consciously think thoughts that feel good.

Make a choice to walk away from emotional and physical places that don't feel good. Do not stay longer with people who don't feel comfortable to be with. It's not about them. It's about you.

Although it may look like someone or someone’s action or a situation has caused you to feel bad, sad or annoyed, it helps to understand that we and we alone are the creators of what is happening to us. Let the emotion be. It will pass. Then relax into a space within you that feels good. As you rest in your relaxed feeling place a new level of awareness dawns.

We often try to make sense of what is happening or why it is happening from this emotional tangle. When we are bound by our negative emotions our sympathetic nervous system activates and stress hormones are released. This does not help with our central nervous system in the long run.

Giving yourself a quiet and alone time to feel your emotions gives these suppressed energies a safe outlet. Watching the rhythmic movement of your breath helps you to detach from the intensity of the feelings and find a comfortable, free flowing space within you.

Recognizing emotions and taking charge of them can start you on an upward or optimistic spiral if you are aware of and care for the way you feel. It may feel quite selfish to turn your attention to feeling better when one “ought to feel sad or desperate”.

When a person goes through recurring negative situations in life, especially when they have been living in positivity and optimism, it could be an experience of the purging of the negative imprints of our soul. In spiritual lingo it is called the dark night of the soul.

From the greatest ecstasy to the deepest loneliness, the range of emotions and the situations one passes through is countless. When you go through your dark night with awareness and patience, it prepares you to a greater empowerment that helps not only you to come out of your situation, but perhaps be a catalyst for the transformation of those around you.

When emotions get sky-high apathy could set in, taking one in a direction of indifference. You may walk away thinking “This is how far it goes”, but the emotional layers that have set into you must be seen with sympathy and understanding.

Insensitivity is an ego barrier that needs careful consideration and compassion so as to gently peel the layers of deep hurts and pains. Regular relaxed breathing is your helper here.

People need a lot of positivity and happiness before they can breathe their way through the insensitive barrier. Once this balloon is pierced then emotional management becomes easier.

Be nicer to yourself if you don't catch your negative emotions. Be gentle with yourself if your downward spiral of emotions takes you to a different tangent. Take care to not beat yourself up with "I should have done this, or I could have done it earlier." See yourself with love and kindness. For every downward experience there is an expansion of our soul.

Make Peace with Emotions

Personally, I had a privacy policy with regard to my emotions and opinions. Happiness and appreciation were to be shared while pain and displeasure were my private feelings. It worked for a long time until life spun out my bottled-up emotions. No more was I shy about the so-called negativities. Even a well-placed anger was healing to many.

The balance did not come all at once. The right balance was achieved after I learned to express emotions safely. Being a life coach, I facilitate the emotional release for many of my clients. This gave me courage to express mine in my own comfortable space and privacy. There were emotions that were totally new to me because I had never felt them before.

I chose to be gentle with myself, often journaling what I felt. I decided to be honest with what I was feeling. After all they were my emotions, and they came from within me. Denying them only meant I was pushing away the feeling part of me to pretense or numbness.

As long as I was numb to my emotions, I was frozen to life too. There was no need to fear emotions. They showed up as tears, bodily sensations, movements and sometimes verbal. Only after I came to be at ease with all my emotions did I begin to express them as a response to current situations.

Once the old pent-up stuff was released it was easy to live in the present moment. When emotions sprung out of control, I was gentle and kind with myself. I began to fully feel the present moment. There was no more shakiness nor suppression. The right words flowed at the right time with the right emotions. I knew when to speak up and when to stay quiet.

When emotions no longer have a hold on you, you will ride the waves of the emotions. If you feel an emotion, allow it to be. Emotions only indicate which direction you are headed. If it is positive, you are heading towards a happy outcome. If you do not feel good, it only means that you need a little focus to shift your thinking towards optimism and release negative thoughts. Gradually the negative emotions will make their way to greater stability and clarity.

With regular practice of feeling positive emotions, you can make great progress moving up the emotional ladder. Making peace with the spectrum of emotions will free you to more love and happiness. There is more authenticity and genuine expression of ideas. You would not resort to please people, no matter what, nor would you pretend to be someone you are not.

For my part, there was a strength that showed up in me that let me be who I am and where I am. I began to embrace my situations with love and acceptance. I now see the evolving beauty in every emotion not only in me but in others too.

Being emotionally vulnerable is a temporary phase. As we accept our vulnerability it makes way for more compassion and more honesty. Life wholly became an expression of love and happiness. The emotional expressions of others do not affect your emotional stability.

The way to this stability is through systematic optimism. Spend time everyday fine tuning your thoughts towards what you want, and how you wanted to live your life etc. This also means that you are no longer living a default life. Life becomes purposeful in all senses because you become deliberate with the way you think.

From my standpoint, it took consistent practice. When my changed thoughts and emotions began to show results, it took courage to share with the world. Making peace with emotions is not a one-time job. It is a daily practice. At first it seems overwhelming but with the right tools and diligent practice anyone can remain happy, calm and sail through the days comfortably and expect a few surprising delights too! Such is the beauty of positive thinking.


Our ability to return to our core emotional space determines the clarity of our thoughts, ability to connect with people, take ownership of our emotional and mental well-being, it helps us to return to our creator mode. It helps to be aware of our thought process and its correlation to our emotions. It helps to take charge of our life as a whole. It helps to release our need to blame or criticize others or self and to be responsible for one’s own happiness and situations.

It takes a lot of love and compassion to be yourself, allowing the dark and light aspects of us. Sometimes it takes a lot of courage and determination to love oneself or another. Rest assured that we are an unending well of love and wisdom. The intelligent choices that we make with love always initiates a new blessed path.

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