Lessons from Everyday Heroes

Through my life experiences, my work as well as my travels I have been fortunate to meet many unsung heroes (and heroines) whose actions have changed the lives of many around them. They quietly find time amidst their busy schedules, often away from their call of duty to open their hearts, homes, and wallets even to strangers. Yet, they do not expect plaudits but gather immense satisfaction from their own gestures. Unadulterated passion for life fuels them.

In this blog I am sharing:

• Stories from my life

• Tips to balance giving and receiving

• A Final Thought!

Let me tell you a couple of stories from my life

Story 1:

A dear friend belongs to this tribe of everyday heroes. At a time when I was going through the most confusing and toughest period of my life, she and her family opened their hearts and home for me. I was living alone and finding peace with my newfound single status.

Work, home, and friends were going well, and I kept myself cheerful and active every day. Yet there were moments every now and then when I would slip into a slump. Every time she noticed the downward shift in my energy, she would request someone to pick me up from home.

She would casually tell me to carry a change of clothes so that I could spend a day or two with her. The time I spent there was different - the conversations were lively and diverse, and they took me far away from my feelings of being alone. When I came back home, I invariably felt refreshed and ready to plunge into a life on my own.

She and her husband had earlier given a safe space in their home to neighbors of another religion during the Bombay riots. It wasn’t about taking risks. It was about their humaneness and compassion. It was the right thing for them to do, and they stood by their conviction. The benevolence of life supported them and kept them safe.

Story 2:

At a later stage, a compassionate police officer played a brief yet masterful role in our life as he mentored my son. An unconditional listener and universal father figure, he partnered with us for a couple of months and guided my son until he found a job.

As my son spent more time with him, he started to dress smartly and began to trust himself. I found him taking responsibility and ownership of his life. I was not aware of the nature of conversations that transpired between them. The officer insisted that I always be soft with my son.

He was a quick learner, and when I began to see changes, I knew this was a godsend intervention. From a lethargic and depressed person with little regard for himself, my son made this transition in just a few months.

The degree of self-respect and gentleness that settled into him could be seen in his self-belief and the ease with which he confidently began to move about in his daily routine. These qualities were inherent in him. He just needed a timely and gentle prodding to settle into it.

This mentor was a paragon of compassion, especially for the youngsters. He stopped by to understand the reasons behind their actions. In almost all instances, he did his best to counsel them to be productive members of society. His thought, "they are also humans," urged him to always look for a way out for everyone.

Later, when I came to know that he was a recipient of the President's Medal for his service, I wasn’t surprised. I felt honored to have come across him. I wondered how many lives must have been touched by the gentle presence of this unconventional policeman! The term "earth-angel" fits him perfectly.

Balanced Giving and Receiving

Don't we all have stories like these to share? I have plenty of stories like these that I can recall. I too have given to many. What makes a stranger offer the gift of life to you? Do you think Karma has a role here? Was it past life imprints? I am inclined to believe that our past life carryovers appear as circumstances like these. Yet our current life thoughts and actions are meant to bring us to a balancing place where giving meets receiving.

Reflecting on these moments, I realized that true generosity is not just about giving but also about receiving with an open heart. These experiences taught me that life flows best when we allow both in equal measure. Here are some qualities that you can build as well as some aspects to be mindful of while giving.

The Conviction:

Being able to offer time, space, and other resources in our daily life for someone in need is not easy for everyone. It requires a strong conviction and an emotional stability to stand apart courageously. Without our own inner resources and without feeling fulfilled on a basic level, we have nothing to offer another.

These people stood in my life to help me open to the act of receiving, which until then I had never known. I had only given. I had never received this way. When you are a selfless giver, it feels natural to give. But when you stand to receive from someone unexpectedly at a time of need, it is a sweet experience like no other.

The Satisfaction:

Life was showing me pure loving support through them at a time when I most needed it. Life taught me that I needed to balance the art of giving and receiving through my experiences with these people. There was no need to feel guilty or embarrassed.

Through receiving, I learned the art of allowing life to the fullest and feeling fulfilled. I did not question my worthiness, nor did I defend myself. Life is never complete, yet our true success is in our ability to see the wholeness of every moment and be satisfied.

The Acceptance:

When we allow and accept life as it shows up, we let in life in its pure and raw essence. Light and darkness show up in their true nature. The positive and negative aspects of life have their balance. One does not exist without the other.

We often hate the shadow side of life and uphold a sense of righteousness. When we learn to go past negative circumstances and feel the related emotions, we find a strength and clarity that we have never known before. It is through the acceptance of the negative emotions that we build our courage to love.

Say ‘YES’ to life, and accept the help, support, gifts, care, and kindness that come your way. In keeping your hands and hearts open to the gift of life, you receive the richness of life in abundance and thus become a selfless giver.

The Space:

We are fueled by our emotions of the moment, and we would benefit from awareness and understanding of how we feel in any given moment. What are your feelings at the time of giving? Is it based on a need to fulfill an emotional gap? Or do you feel satisfied and flowing in your giving? Feeling regrets or criticizing the receiver doesn't help in the balance of giving.

The Flow:

To give and to receive, your heart and mind must be open. We must trust the benevolence of the Universe and release our limiting beliefs.

The Now:

Live in the present moment. Be mindful of slipping into feelings of guilt, embarrassment, or power struggle when giving or receiving. In the balance of give and take, there is no shame or inequality, only the satisfaction and fulfillment of the moment.

A Final Thought!

The undertone of life is genuine love, joy, and creativity in perfect balance. To be a giver of life, we must receive from the Source of Life.

It takes courage to love life wholeheartedly, to open ourselves as recipients of the universal energy that flows through us. When we give, we are not merely offering material resources but sharing the life force that sustains and uplifts. Sometimes, those we give to may have temporarily lost access to this energy, and in those moments, we become beacons of love and examples of a balanced life.

A surplus of life force, when nurtured with awareness, becomes fuel for someone else’s journey. The more we align with this flow, the more we realize that giving and receiving are not separate acts but a seamless rhythm of life itself.